play it and then read
28 February.Yup. My handphone went noisy at 1am this day.
And I looked at it.
Im suppose to be happy actually with that reminder I set.
I forgotten about that reminder actually.
Yes readers. I just went through a break up.
Things did not work out I guess.
What I want to share with you guys, is the experience through this.
True it hurts. The pain, is like terok you know.
Like I've kept myself busy the whole day.
And I am shagged out.
And I thought yeah, I can do this.
But as soon as we humans relax on our pillows at the end of the day, we tend to reflect.
And thoughts of what we were before, starts to come back.
Waves and waves of emotions kept battering this heart.
Oh the heavy heart, full of joy and sadness together, at the same time,
The breakup affected my thinking on everything.
But I know this is just temporary.
The biggest battle ever,
is hating thyself. As you know, impulsive behaviour.
People do shit to you, and you feel hate, anger.
Thats the biggest battle ever, fighting with my anger.
The solution initially was her smile, that made me sleep with sober.
Because it stills gave me warmth.
But it has to go soon.
And as February has faded away.
And with everything, settling down, taking it's rightful place.
Yeah, she is happy.
Being close to the family like never before.
And I smile now.
True, I am sad still.
But she's 19 now.
And through the 2 to 3 years knowing her.
I know she can take care of herself. =)
And I see the beauty of this break up, this relationship.
The good times, the bad times.
I learn, We learn.
And now you are happy, Im happy.
A thank you.
To those who were there for this whole month.
Yesmint,Adam,Badriah,Ain,Zana and the rest.
You guys have been great help.
For those with fists and bats and all.
Stop it yeah. Seriously.
For you guys with insults,advices,opinions.
I appreciate it. And thank you.
Ending.
This love we had, it was awesome.
This breakup,
I see the beauty in it, the beauty in you, in us.
And I am proud of myself.
That I gave my all, and you did appreciate it.
and now, I can slowly let go, smiling tonight.
Goodbye February, I'll miss you.
:)
Labels: February Stars
